What is the difference between a porcupine and a Ford?
Porcupines have pricks on the outside...

What do you call a Ford project car?
Keeping it running

Why does Ford Suck?
Because they are like buttholes, everyones got one, and they all stink.

Whats the difference between a ford and a tampon?
A tampon comes with its own tow rope.

Why are emergency telephone boxes painted blue
So the Ford owners can match that to the Ford emblem and
know where to call for a tow truck.

Whats worse than missing the toilet bowl?
Driving a Ford

What would you have if you had 100 Ford trucks and one GM truck
You would have a good junk yard and one good tow truck.

Why does the Ford AU ute has cup and thermos holders built into the tailgate?
So when you push the ute you can have a drink at the same time.

Why did Ford put heaters in the tailgates of their new cars?
To keep their hands warm when they are pushing the truck into the shop.

Why are there sidewalks beside most streets?
So Ford owners don't have to walk home on the road.

How is a golf ball different from a Ford?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards!

What does the GT stand for on a Ford Mustang?
Glue together!

What should the Ford Tarus really be called?
The FORD Tow-us

Whats the difference between a Ford and a shopping trolley?
A shopping trolley is alot easier to push

Where do ford owners go for help?
Fords Anonimus

How come Ford makes tractros and Holden doesn't?
Because Holden cant get one to run that slow

What should the Ford Asipire really be called?
The Ford Expire

Why do Fords have magnetized bumpers?
They needed something to pick up the parts that fell off along the way

Why do Dealers give away a free dog with every Ford
So the owners will have someone to walk home with

Whats worse than drinking from the toilet?
Driving a Ford

Why are the new Fords so much more aerodynamic?
So they will save the Holden gas when towing it<

What did the Holden say to the Ford?
Would you like a tow home?

Whats the best way to start improving a Ford
Put a Holden engine in it.

How much wood can a Ford truck haul, if a Ford truck could haul wood?
As much as the Holden tow truck in front of it

What should the Ford Taurus be called?
The Ford Tortious

What should the Ford Probe be called?
The Ford Problem

What should a Ford Thunderbird be called?
The ford Thunderturd

What should the Ford mustang be called?
The Must Bang or the Rustang

How do you double the value of a Ford?
Fill it with gas
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