McGSP 1999 Manifesto Contents

An Example to us all

The Clan McGillicuddy has long been impressed and encouraged by the example of Maori Marae life. Tribal Maori culture will fit easily into the Great Leap Backwards, thus enabling most Maori to make an almost immediate transition to the magnificent medieval McGillicuddy paradise. Also, the highly developed Maori sense of fun makes them even better candidates for McGillicuddy Serious doctrine.

No Money, But Heaps Of Land

The McGillicuddy Serious Party has by far the best land-rights settlement policy of any Party. We propose to return many millions of acres to the Tangata Whenua. This will not be all of the land of Aotearoa of course, as some will have to be given to other tribes, and the new clans that arise from the Ministzy of Clan Planning’s monumental efforts.

Due to the abolition of money, there will however be no monetary compensation whatsoever for anyone in these settlements, but it is safe to say that more land will be returned under McGillicuddy rule, than would be under all the other parties put together.

Throughout this vigorous and surprisingly rapid compulsory land acquisition and redistribution process, Pakeha farmers will have nothing to fear. They will be adequately compensated for the loss of their land with many good axes, and fluffy woollen blankets, items which will be highly sought after following the Great Leap Backwards.

Crucial diplomacy

It appears that under the present Treaty of Waitangi, it may be illegal for the McGillicuddy Serious Government to abolish parliament. So Maori will first have to ditch their pakeha-style bureaucrats, businesspeople and other professionals, who out of greed and selfishness are attempting to drag Maoridom down the western road and who might appeal to the Waitangi Tribunal to stop the abolition of parliament. To help traditional Maori silence the “Brown Table”, the McGillicuddy Serious Party will bribe them with bits of redundant Auckland City Real-estate, and other useless 20th Century trinkets.

Te Tiriti o Waitangi

New Versions of the Treaty will be written and signed by all the Tribes and Clans, with Bonnie Prince Geoffie at Waitangi, so the nations founding document will continue to be Te Tiriti o Waitangi. The new version will emphasise fun, tribalism, Tino Rangatiratanga and adherence to the principals of pre-industrial technology, and total isolationism. The new ECONOMY will be included, defining methods of trading (ie all consumables can be bartered, but longer lived items (such as HOUSING, clothing, carvings, paintings, furniture) can only be given away.)

Any person or tribe not willing to sign the new treaty, will be given 6 months to pack up and clear out (see APPLICATION TO BECOME AN AUSTRALIAN CITIZEN).

Maori outside the iwi structure will need to go through the same exciting process as most pakeha, ie club together into new/different Clans (see CLAN PLANNING). The Urban Maori Authorities are already a big step in this direction.